Be Careful What You Ask For

After the service, meatballs, and farewell chocolate cake for one of the long-time church member families moving to South Carolina, we joined everyone at the Big House as usual.

Outside was more sun and mild temps.

Inside, Yali was upset. Again. This time he was sobbing in the living room because Oxbear wouldn’t let him watch Daniel Tiger on his iPhone. Puck, as always, grabbed him gently by the shoulders and began the usual speech…

“Yali! Yali! Listen! Yali. Now. No means no, Yali. So think about what you’re going to do, and if it’s the right thing to do. Are you going to be bad, or are you going to be bien? Yali! Yali! Alright. Choose to be bien. Do you want to go outside, Yali? Chirp, chirp? Chirp, chirp?”

This satisfied Yali, and there were no more tears. At least until the next time.

Meanwhile, Francis – lounging on the couch under a sleepy cat – was being solicited by Mom to get some work done.

“Francis, how about you go burn those pizza boxes outside in the fire pit. The boys would enjoy that.”

“But Snuggles is massaging my shoulder.”

Rose reached over and lifted the cat off his chest.

“No! Why would you do that?”

“Goodbye. Rodent,” Rose told the cat, dropping him ingloriously on the floor.

Snuggles isn’t known around here for being the most well-behaved cat to ever grace the halls of the Snicketts family home. But he does appreciate a good snuggle – hence the name – and usually dispatches himself onto the often-napping form of Francis.

It was one of the those lazy Sunday afternoons that eventually wound its way into homemade tomato soup and sourdough milk rolls for dinner after Carrie-Bri returned from another bunny event to give Elmer a near-military-style haircut, Irish and Thumper left to help lead youth group, Oxbear organized the old tape cassette drawer “for fun” (why we even have tape cassettes anymore, I have no idea), and Francis rewired Rose’s ancient bronze peacock lamp in payment for some loan she’d give him. I still own the transcript to one of these loans. It goes something like this:

“I, (Francis Snicketts), do hereby agree to pay back the sum of $$$$ borrowed from Big E’s Totally-Legit Loans. I will be given one year to repay my debt, acknowledging that failure to make payments may result in the following (not limited to):

1. Goons may steal my kidneys.

2. My teeth might end up missing.

3. I will get my entire left leg waxed.”