Life Goals

“Honey, I’m going to make you some fried eggs for breakfast, and I want you to eat them while I get Yali ready. Okay?”

Puck was halfway through a Minecraft tutorial and clearly hadn’t heard me. “Okay… Mom, can you make me some food?”

With my boys busy doing other things hither and yon on a pretty mild sunny Saturday morning in February, I ran errands. Including the grocery store. Which was a mistake. I had completely forgotten it was Super Bowl weekend.

It was almost five o’clock when my boys got back for dinner, followed by a small bonfire in the backyard and a haircut for Yali. Sheared down those silky black locks to a style I could only describe as “Fresh Out of the Orphanage”. Puck was so overcome by the cuteness of his baby brother, that he threw himself onto the couch next to Yali and began singing ballads to him.

About ten minutes later I removed Puck from turning somersaults on my bed – those boys clearly believe I love having it used as a gymnastics floor routine on a regular basis – and stuck him in the shower.

During this transition, I made the mistake of asking Puck what he wanted to be when he grew up.

“A butt-ologist.”

“Ah.”

“There are actually butt-ologists, Mom.” He ran off where I heard the conversation continue down the hall. “Dad? Did you know that there actually are butt-ologists?”

“Yeah. But they’re not called butt-ologists. They’re called proctologists.”

This must have been some kind of revelation to Puck, who obviously believed this was a profession he had just invented himself. “I WANT TO BE A PROCTOLOGIST WHEN I GROW UP!”

A noble goal, my son.

So while he let that thought mellow for awhile, Oxbear put Yali down to bed to some electronic folk jazz.

It had been a long day of organizing the house and collecting paperwork for taxes and the next post-adoption update. So Oxbear and I decided to wind down the day with another episode of “Firefly”. I also remembered to grab one of Oxbear’s favorites at the grocery store: Ben & Jerry’s “Chunky Monkey”. He can keep it.